The Same Deep Water As You (40/54)
Dec. 8th, 2011 09:34 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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haikusociety
The Same Deep Water As You
by
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solo____ & jo_lasalle Pairing: Kamenashi Kazuya / Akanishi Jin
Rating: Explicit
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Alternate Universe fiction. None of this is true.
Warnings: If there are any warnings for this story, you will find them here.
Summary: Kame's got his reasons for seeing prostitutes. Jin's got his reasons for being one. Life is pretty screwed up.
Notes: Story notes, acknowledgements and frantically reiterated disclaimers are here.
Previous chapters | Current chapter
"Come on," the client cajoles. His client. The one he had a deal with. "We're going to pay you extra."
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(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-08 02:00 pm (UTC)Not a nice start of a chapter, but at least a nice ending for a chapter.
Seems like they have soon to admit that there are feelings involved.
No way around that after Jin got consoled by Kame. He even fled to him, just to exaggerate it. Furthermore, don't forget the soccer. :D
Well written as usual ❤
Especially their anxieties.
thanks ^.^
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-09 08:04 pm (UTC)We kind of needed the not-so-nice start to get to the nice ending. ;)
Admitting there are feelings involved isn't so hard, really. The question is, what do you do with those feelings then?
Thanks for commenting!
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-09 09:05 pm (UTC)Assuming that it's the first step for them to realize their feelings it can just get more exciting. Reaaaaally looking forward to your solution. :D
So far it just gets more difficult.
Btw, of how many words does this story consist?
Furthermore, do you have any plans to release a single file of the whole story?
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-12 08:48 pm (UTC)We aren't totally sure how many words the story has, since we haven't completely finished editing it. Our first full draft had 411,040 words, but we're kind of hoping to get it down to 410,000 maybe...
As for publishing it as a single file, we were thinking about it, but did you know you can actually download it as one complete file (well, the chapters so far, and eventually the whole thing) at our domicile on AO3? It's here: http://archiveofourown.org/users/haikuesque
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-13 11:49 am (UTC)I don't know where to start with the first step and where do end. ^.^;
Hm... around the time they got to know each other after Kame resolved his association with his ex? Seriously, no idea.
I like it complicated as long as I don't have to solve it myself. :P
Thanks~
oh, didn't know that, usually just one place to read it is enough for me.
I will get the whole story/book as soon as it's finished. One whole year, wow.
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-14 08:59 pm (UTC)Yes, one year. And we started writing in 2008. It's going to feel weird when we're done. *g*
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-08 02:04 pm (UTC)On a real note though, Jin's desperation was so vivid, all those quick mental calculations and that whole paragraph about the strollers after he managed to get away and I wonder, how could you even write this. Like this. Because it's so real.
And "It takes two rings and forever." That's such a brilliant sentence, short and full of meaning. And then there's that whole part about Jin thinking about not thinking about it and that works so well too...
And Jin... He sort of muddled through again--admittedly with some help this time, but still--I'm so proud of him *____*
And Kame. He waited for god know how long and... he was such a gentleman. I love this side of your Kame, always striving to remain in charge, but never selfish. He's adorable. I could almost overlook all the guilt when he was this worried about Jin and trying to help and-- I'm rambling.
Then, when it seemed like things were finally looking up there was that bit where my mind went into capslock with "OH MY GOD. SURELY NOT EDA OH FUCK-- EDA." And Kame handled that so well too.
This here was genius: "Some guy had sex with Jin and treated him so he's like this. Quiet and shaky, and thinking Kame has no use for him but to fuck him too." So raw and a bit like the unexpected high of tripping downstairs and I don't know why but I think it's perfect for this. You summed up so many feelings in two sentences. #amazed
And you wrote Kame combing his fingers through Jin's hair and "It's like the day finally slowed down, like they stopped stumbling over themselves," and that felt so different, out of place somehow, but in a good way. Genuine comfort. And Kame was so distressed watching Jin break down--I have no idea how obvious this really was to the outside eye, your Kame is amazingly observant #UnreliableNarrator-- just a few paragraphs earlier... I'm not sure which of them needed that the most.
"He doesn't let go of the glass, and for a moment, they're frozen like that." THIS mental image. Priceless. I love it. *_____*
And they just get better from then on. The pizza thing was genius and Kame making Jin agree to take a cab, and ultimately deciding to just stay there, and that, god, that line was gorgeous too. What you wrote about him seeing what's right in front of him and not... other stuff.
And then that really cute moment at the end and... I don't know, okay? This chapter was just, um, it. Or something. And your Akame probably know that too by now because... yes. And I really have to go now. But I couldn't wait to comment >___>
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-09 08:04 pm (UTC)We're happy that Jin's panic and shakiness came through properly, and Kame's amazing charge-taking, too! We love Kame in charge!
And thank you for quoting the sentences you liked back to us, we always get a kick out of knowing just what worked and how. (Srsly, we'd have no problems with 300 words, though the LJ comment field might.)
Eda is... not even one of the worst clients, he's just totally wrong for Jin. And very KY, yeah. He'd probably be just fine with an equally KY escort, or an escort who just didn't care so much.
Thank you for these lovely comments. (And also the twitter flailing, we were very gleeful.)
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-08 03:13 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-09 08:05 pm (UTC)And no doubt Kame will get over his guilt eventually and at least he's being constructive about it now and Jin got over the mess quickly with Kame's help so everything is good, y/y?
Declarations of love gratefully accepted! ♥
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-10 10:28 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-08 04:52 pm (UTC)Thursday, come again soon!
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-09 08:05 pm (UTC)Thank you for commenting.
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-08 06:20 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-09 08:05 pm (UTC)Glad you enjoyed the chapter! Thank you for letting us know. :)
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-08 07:13 pm (UTC)thanks for update ^___^
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-09 08:05 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-08 07:40 pm (UTC)...be back later. xd
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-09 06:15 am (UTC)You know how I could tell it was ominous? That, you know, slider thing on the side of the browser?<--(fail) Yeah that thing? It was TINY. Hee...XD
Yes, very satisfactory angst in this chapter. This time angst with no asshole Kame. I approve of that kind of angst.
"Hi Jin. It's Kame. How are you? Okay, I know this is your voice-mail." Smooooth Kame.
Jin calming down by listening to Kame's voice... Oh, my poor heart.
I could almost feel my heart breaking when Jin saw Kame with Tatsuya. First he got all panicky with Mikami when he pictured Kame possibly leaving or GOING WITH SOMEONE ELSE. And then he rushes in there and there's the guy he's secretly crazy about SMILING with Tatsuya who's more elegant and has better hair and with Kame who needs his sex and oh my gosh... In Jin's mind of course.
'"No plans," Kame affirms, upbeat enough that Jin knows it's definitely all right.'-- DON'T SAY THAT KAME YOU IDIOT!
Through the ENTIRE scene with Eda I was literally screaming (loudly whispering) "Save him! SAVE HIM!" at Kame. Thanks goodness he came through. But then poor Jin figuring that Kame can't possibly want him without sex, and the horrible moment when they had to openly talk about it.
But then POOR KAME. That guilt is going to kill him. Things are never going to be right until he addressed this. YOU'RE SAVING JIN NOW KAME NOT HURTING HIM.
The soccer match was absolutely adorable. Jin with his head in Kame's lap, Kame hand in Jin's hair, men kicking a ball fruitlessly back and forth on the screen... so sweet.
I knew the cuddling was going to happen. In the state that Jin was in, oh yeah, it was going to happen. And it was written just so beautifully. Jin's silent desperation; the sudden moment where he just GAVE IN, everything piling up and overwhelming him and he just needed Kame and Kame alone right then. And Kame was there for him and held him tight, and if it wasn't for that horrible guilt...
There morning scene was adorable; a bit reminiscent of a fifties American tv show honestly XD.
Side-note: Something bad needs to happen to those three guys. I don't care if they technically "didn't" hurt him. I think that they techincally "do" need to have something unpleasant happen to them. Yes. Like. Bad.
Yeah.
This was definitely another contender for the favourite chapter. I'm going to have to pick favourites according to genre now I think.
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-09 08:23 pm (UTC)We are pleased to have provided acceptable angst. Go us! ;-)
But srlsy, thank you for this great comment. This was... a chapter we're quite fond of ourselves, we'd planned it for a long time, and important stuff happens in it.
And Kame is a dork on voicemail. *g* Glad you liked that!
He was a little helpless when Eda first showed up, poor guy. He was still so focused on putting no pressure on Jin, it didn't occur to him that Eda was going to do just that... and when it happened, well, he also didn't want to act as if he owned Jin, he really needed to figure out first that Jin was in need of actual protection. It's a hard job trying to be helpful to traumatized whores!
We're really pleased the developments up in the suite worked so well for you and were effective. This is emotional stuff, and we were hoping we could get that across. Thank you.
a bit reminiscent of a fifties American tv show honestly
LOL that is a pretty cool description. Heeeee.
The three guys - personally, we'd be happy to cut their nuts off and stuff them down their throats. But life is rarely perfect. :/
Ha ha, the idea of genre tickles us. 'Crack', 'Horror', 'Romance'...? :)
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-09 08:06 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-08 08:39 pm (UTC)I need to read it again. Thank you for all this wonderfull thursday.
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-09 08:24 pm (UTC)Thank you for commenting!
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-08 09:21 pm (UTC)I mean, besides their inner deamons, the hardships they still will have to face.
But for now I'm content with this. Kame is so nice, keeping Jin all save, keeping him from breaking. Haww I love your Jin so much...( ´ ▽ ` )♥
I mean, of course I love Kame too but I kinda more empathize with him so it's like sharing his feelings for Jin, I guess? Sry for the strangeness
I hope you won't get me wrong but that's the first chapter in a long time that left me satisfied. Not aching for something, just happy and content. They just fit...
*dreams aways now, gubai*
PS: long time no comment. I'm sorry *pretends you have even noticed, so the fluffy feeling is complete*
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-09 08:24 pm (UTC)Okay, just kidding. We did notice - authors can get kind of *cough* obsessive about their comments - but we know how life can get busy and distracting, and hey, nobody owes us comments. We're just very happy when we get them.
We also totally understand what you mean when you say that you love Jin so much because you empathize with Kame. It makes perfect sense! (We kind of sort of started out the other way round, really, only now we love Kame simply for being amazing.)
And we're happy the chapter left you satisfied! It's kind of special to us too!
Yes, they fit.Welcome back! :)
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-10 01:49 am (UTC)Well wasn't it from the start, that I was the only weirdo, who took Kames side and understood his motives? XD Kame is practically my... soul brother? XD Hawww wouldn't that be nice to have the real Kame as your soul mate...
I don't do drugs. I'm just strangely happy when indulging in delusional fangirling.
It's just that I finally and utterly could feel the love! :D It feels like they took an important step forward!
How Jin got his strenght to go on just by thinking of Kame and hearing his voice on voicemail and Kame hiding the wounded Jin from other people like a good old clucking hen :')
Why does it sound perverted when you cross it out...?
Tadaima! :')
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-08 11:54 pm (UTC)The opening was terrific and terrifying... all this time I've been wondering how there wasn't more unpleasantness in Jin's job and maybe he was just used to it by now and WHAM... this. And then when he's dealing with the aftermath, what you let us know obliquely is devastating enough without the full picture:
At least he never had to tell anybody about which order they took and how rusty the fence was and who started with the piss.
It makes sense that Jin doesn't want to dwell or talk about it or dredge up his own memories from the past. It's very realistically written and totally in his head, not giving the readers an exposition because they're curious, because in this scenario his reaction and coping is more important than the sordid details of the past.
And then Kame's messages... like a breath of fresh air in this dark pit.
He'll be all over Kame, looking for… stuff that's stupid, stuff he'll never get, and no client should have to put up with that. T______________T
Jin's conflict between wanting to see Kame but not being in the right state of mind to take care of Kame... and then Kame of course being perceptive enough to notice. But that first moment where Jin spots them and Kame's with Tatsuya was an unpleasant lurch. I think it made both Jin and me as a reader realize that their whole... thing is built on a house of cards. One small mistake, a misplaced word or gesture and they wouldn't have to interact with each other ever again. It's not like love... it's a business transaction and Jin has other clients and Kame has other options if he chooses to exercise them and they're both so careful with each other but have the potential to really hurt each other. That's what makes what they have so special... as Jin says, Kame's not like the others (his past behavior aside). They choose to be thoughtful of each other in what could normally be a very cynical relationship.
Jin's slight, unnamed jealousy over Tatsuya, but still trying to be professional about Kame's expectations. <3 Eda's KY-ness as an excuse for Kame's overprotective side to emerge... ahhhhh, so warm and fuzzy. <3 <3 <3
Jin let Kame take him away to be safe, and it's Kame's job to keep him safe. LET ME DIE
They still end up wandering around the suite together while brushing their teeth. THIS IMAGE.... such domestic bliss.
Kame waits, breathing away the shock of Jin's body so close after a day like this, and how new it feels when it's nothing but this. *WEEPING* at all the domesticity, the intimacy apart from sex, the EMOTION here that has nothing to do with the real reason they're in a costly room at the middle of the night.
Then gasps when Jin's arm goes tight around him and Jin pulls crushingly close, demanding like never before, with his leg over Kame and his face pressing into Kame's neck. THIS MOMENT... I gasped, like really gasped in real life. It has so much meaning between them... it's so sculpted out of the reality they share... a moment of truth and honesty in an otherwise professional and sometimes mundane or sordid reality.
I LOVED this chapter... even though at times Jin or Kame had thoughts they didn't share with each other I feel this is the most honest they've been with each other, the most caring and sensitive. Kame was brilliant, utterly brilliant. And Jin, poor thing. *snuggles*
♥♥♥♥
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-09 08:25 pm (UTC)The club is actually designed to keep the unpleasantness to a minimum, with all their precautions. Jin got lucky in landing there. But still, even the club can't control everything and yes, stuff happens. Like it did with Jason, too. Some clients will just... act out, particularly if they aren't club members but ordering out and feeling safe on their own territory.
Jin most emphatically doesn't want to think about any of the stuff that happened in the past. That's how it took so long for him to manage even this relatively unambiguous thought about it. But yeah, when stuff like that client happens, it kind of brings it back.
Tatsuya... we were looking forward to seeing reactions to that, a little evilly. Because people were wondering about Kame and Tatsuya and if he might ever go back, and it's legitimate to wonder if all there is between him and Jin is a business arrangement, and how can Jin know what Kame thinks... yeah. Well, that's that one cleared up. (One down, however many to go.)
And thank you for quoting back sentences which worked. There are some of our favourites among them, and it's always nice to know somebody else noticed them too. :D
Yeah, they were definitely being pretty honest - particularly Jin, who had been keeping stuff back a little. Here he's not even pretending any more.
We're really happy you liked it!
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-10 12:15 am (UTC)I don't know what to say about it. I loved it ♥
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-12 08:50 pm (UTC)Thank you. ♥
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-10 10:05 am (UTC)But thankfully Kame visited the club today. And its so lucky that Kame calls Jin on his handphone. Cause he has literally been the rock for him today. What Kame did back then was not excusable but it is different and seems milder to what happened with Inaba. Though trauma is trauma and you can't really say one is less bad than the other. Its actually interesting to read how Kame who Jin found weird for awhile is now his solace. ( It so important that you've written this chapter I feel. Like somehow its come a full circle though not quite cause the events aren't exactly the same.) One who would protect him from other predators like Eda. It seems like Kame values Jin more than just a host which we have been noticing for awhile but when Kame picked Jin over Tatsuya's company, it just makes the fact more profound. And Kame watching a soccer match was just such a weird picture in my mind.
And Jin despite going through what he did with Inaba wanting to explain to Kame himself which wasn't really necessary, I felt that too is so very significant. (I am pretty sure Ootomo could have explained on his behalf, that would have made Kame worry even more.) And I am glad he got comfort from Kame and didn't have to spend the nigh alone even though they didn't talk about what happened.
I really enjoyed reading this chapter. There was so much going on in just one chapter, so thanks very much for sharing this and am really excited to read what you're leading us to in the next one.!~~~ :D
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-12 08:50 pm (UTC)What Kame did to Jin... actually, we don't think it was any better than what Inaba did; we think you're right when you say trauma is trauma. With Inaba, at least Jin didn't know what was going on while it was going on, and after that, he got a fright but nothing more actually happened. Kame had him terrified for hours, and kept doing stuff to him. :/
You're also totally right that this chapter shows how things have changed... the full circle thing was very important to us. We did need that somewhere.
Thank you for noticing, and telling us that you did! :)
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-10 03:37 pm (UTC)I wanted so much to comment and to thank you for the wonderful chapters, but I was barely able to read them.. aargh!
So now that I am having my hair done and so I'm without children around, I'll leave you a huge THANK YOU :D!
The 3 previous chapters were wonderful, the hamster, the mob in the combini, Tanaka and his silent recognition of Jin's importance in Kame's life.. everything was beautiful :)))))
And the last one.. at the beginning I was completely terrified for Jin. Then I was so sad for him and his fragility after that horrible experience, and in the end I was worried about Kame's reaction.
I thought that he could have freaked out and in some way refused to take care of Jin. I know it's unfair toward Kame, but here we are talking about a real change in their relationship.
It's not anymore about having fun and sex and intimacy with Jin (so feelings that go from good to better), now it's the time to take the bad things.. to be a partner for Jin, not a customer to be pleased.
So I was moved by Kame's behaviour :) He was perfect. And I loved the way he embraced Jin and kept him in his arms. He showed that he is real.
I was wondering if and when Kame will interrogate himself about his feelings. Last chapter he was almost shocked thinking about what Jin could feel for him (really a intense moment). So I cannot imagine his reaction when he'll have to decide/admit/confess what HE feels.
Ah, their situation is so complicate! I love this story :)))
Thank you again and talk to you next week :)
PS: I'll be in Japan in April for KT concerts, will you by any chance be there??
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-12 08:55 pm (UTC)We love your descriptions; 'the hamster and the mob in the conbini' should be a song title! We're also very pleased you liked those things, and yeah, Tanaka is a really good friend to Kame (and a generally good guy all round, really).
The last chapter had all sorts of pitfalls where Kame could have done 'the wrong thing' (almost as many as chapter 28, only here Jin didn't consciously leave him openings) -- but he didn't, ha ha! :-) Because he knows Jin well now, and he cares, and... yeah. We needed that clear. (And also, we really really wanted to write it, we like our fluff as much as the next whore!author.)
And yes, he was perfect. Super!Kame to the rescue of traumatized whores. We're really happy that worked for you. :)
As for April... we don't think we can make it. It's inconvenient for all sorts of reasons, not least of which being that September was recent enough that we haven't really had a chance to save up again, so... T_T. If anything changes, we'll let you know! And if not... well, hope you have fun! You can send us reports. :)
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-12 01:24 pm (UTC)first. OMG jin...i mean i know he is an escort..but damn...working at the club...he shouldnt have to feel unsafe.
it really is ironic that kame is now giving jin comfort from having a bad "date" when he WAS that bad date before.
but im glad that kame was able to give him a sort of shoulder to lean on after being so rattled.
im loving how they are looking forward to spending their time together and able to find real comfort with each other. =)
cant wait for next week!
p.s as always...LOVing the updates...and LOVING this story!
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-12 08:56 pm (UTC)The dangerous aspects of Jin's job really do suck. :-/ But there's assholes everywhere, and when you have assholes who are rich and entitled and feeling very powerful...
Thank you for coming back with this lovely comment, we're glad you liked it so much. ♥
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-14 12:16 am (UTC)And yay for Kame (he's Jin's hero). Pushing down his own guilt to help Jin, it was clearly hard for him but he managed. He's totally given himself away though - if Jin manages to think clearly about it at all, he has to realise that what Kame did is waaaay beyond anything a client with normal client/whore relations would do for him.
(no subject)
Date: 2011-12-14 08:55 pm (UTC)Kame was definitely Jin's hero, though. :-) Yay! It totally is beyond what a normal client would do.
This is a lovely comment, thank you so much! Hope you like tomorrow's chapter too!